OK. Now, everyone outside, outside. Everybody out. Timmy. Timmy. Get away from the adult section. Been placed up high a. No, no. Don't even look at them. Some of those back covers will traumatize you. No. Don't you dare. Timmy. Timmy.
Well, Timmy has just run away with one of the raunchier videos in that collection. Good thing he's never even seen a VHS tape before. He's probably going to try and make TEQ talks with it. Whatever they do. Chaps.
Anyway, apologies for the mess. Like most people, I've fallen on some hard times here at radio rental and I've had no choice but to open up a side business. It's a socially distanced summercamp. Not as easy as it sounds. Let me tell you, at first I was flattered by the response of these young proteges wanting to learn the art of storytelling to be enlightened to the dark corners of the universe. And then I remembered how I really feel about children in this group.
Especially, they are a bunch of nonstarters, a real bunch of zero point zeros. L. O. S. E. R. S Losers, old game boys and gator aid. No attention span, no respect for dammit Timmy. No. Go get Evan to help you clean that up. No, I don't care if you're not talking to him today, then just get whoever. Just do it, please.
Yes. You can have a graham cracker after. Well, anyway, speaking of summercamp, I think I know just the tape for you. This is pretty freaky stuff set in a camp far away from here. I'll just pop it in for you while I go deal with these tiny tyrants and I'll drop all their AI gadgets into the back of the toilet. But that would also make my life harder, wouldn't it? Anyway, enjoy the tape. I was 17, rush at a high school.
There was this Christian camp that I'd gone to every year from like the third grade. You would just go and you take some time to get away from work and life. And the whole idea was just to get away from, like, your phones and the TV and media and had some time to worship and get closer to God. That was the whole idea of it. They hire seasonal workers every year. So there's like staff housing. All the girls stay together, all the guys stay together is way up in the mountains, really an hour from Fresno.
Big, big pine trees. It's like near the redwoods ponds. There's a creek running through the whole camp. We had a bobcat incident, actually. You're not supposed to say Bobcat. You have to call in Bob. I think Ted was bears. He had a walkie and you saw a bear because there were other people with walkies. You didn't want to say, hey, I just saw a bear because that everybody starts freaking out. So I just ran into Ted.
Then we know we have to get the kids very far away from that spot.
We all kind of had time before work actually started to get to know each other and, you know, do the team building exercises and all the hokey stuff. And there was this guy named Kyle, who also worked at the camp. He was in Adventure Rec. They were the lifeguards. And there was some climbing courses and stuff like that. So they would do archery, ballet and all of that kind of stuff, keeping everybody safe and the fun stuff, basically.
He was tall, like probably six, four, really handsome, strong jaw, blue eyes, golden brown, curly hair all around. Good looking dude. Kind of goldenboy. I mean, I was 17. Girls, what kind of open up to him in particular?
He's just kind of had a way you would do things for him and then realized he never asked you to do that. He just kind of navigated it, just kind of pushed it that way. For example, the whole adventure trek thing, sometimes they end up working through lunch. So us in the kitchen would always just save me a plate if they let us know they had to work through lunch. Well, he came through the kitchen one time and he kind of grabbed a rag and, like, wipe something down where I was cleaning.
Oh, now that we're best friends and I help you out all the time, you'll you'll bring me a meal, right? You'll bring me some food for lunch. That's just how he was. Just certain things didn't feel. Right. He'd give you like the big winning pageant smile, but it was never like a real smile. You know, the crinkles by your eyes. It never went to his eyes. Only the mouth. He would try and get you alone.
The minute someone else volunteered to go with, he would just kind of, oh, OK, well, you guys got it. And he would back out, but he would be really insistent on being alone with people. I sort of wrote him off in terms of the weirdness. It's awkward, I'm awkward, too, but I kind of wrote it off at first. He's just. Bad vibes. I mean, everywhere he went, fight started, people hated each other.
You know, people group up into little friend groups. Everywhere he went, people would open up to him. And the next thing you know, this girl knew that or they would open up to each other. Next thing they know, it's all over the camp. Should that happened in their past or, you know, how they grew up? There's a lot of rough childhoods growing up. And he would like infiltrate these groups group by group by group.
Every time he was anyone, it just completely like decimated friendships. He would introduce himself to the group and they'd be like, oh, yeah, Kyle's been hanging out or Kyle wants to go with us to do this. And Kyle wants to go with us do that. And I was chatting with a bunch of my girlfriends one time. They're like Kyle. He's just so sweet. Like I told him stuff that I've never told anybody. Like, I don't even know if I could tell you guys.
And the next thing you know, it's all around the camp that she'd been assaulted and all this awful stuff had happened to her. I feel like he definitely got off on hurting people and he's kind of watching the mayhem happen. He never asked for anything. He would just kind of twist, twist until it popped. I'm really scared of the dark. I'm terrified. And we had just seen a bobcat.
So I had to walk a mile to upper camp in the dark to go back to my housing. It had been seen up and down this trail that I had to walk. It was like a mile. I grew up not far from that camp. So, you know, all the things as far as big Catholic Bobcat's, you want to make yourself look big, you want to make loud, very human noises. You don't hunch over, you know, all the stuff.
I see it. I'm going to grab a stick and I wanna make myself look huge and scare that thing away. It was night, it was pitch black.
If I am walking through some place dark and I hear any kind of sound, I literally like I lose all function, like I fall on the ground and I was freaking out. I did not want to. I was very tired. And I'm walking through the camp and there's Kyle and two friends of his, they're hanging out outside. Those three hung out quite a bit as we're walking up the hill. Kyle says something. How was work? I said over.
I didn't even stop.
He's like, Let me walk you up. Oh, you know, it's pitch black. The mountain line's been around. He wasn't even supposed to be an upper camp. You had to be like one of the few people to be allowed up there because there were young kids. I was like, no, no, I can do it. No, really, it's OK. Just really trying to get him to stay. I'm like, no, I don't want you to get in trouble.
Now, you should probably stay on here. No, I don't. I don't want to get in trouble either, because our boss is up there and, you know, it's it's just really not a good idea. Why don't you stay down here? And I couldn't make him not come. I couldn't make him not walk with me. There was nothing I could do. He's to my right. And he kept slowing down. I wasn't walking super fast or like I would be hard to keep up with.
But he stayed to my right and a little bit behind, not where I could see him comfortably and look where I was going. It was just like a very gripping fear in the middle of my stomach. You need to get out of the situation. What do you have in your pockets right now? What can you see on the ground right now? Can you book it? What can you do? So we've been walking a little bit and then they caught up with us.
The other friend of his. Ended up getting his truck. Thank God he was a really good guy. And I had a suspicion he kind of felt the same way I did. But it ended up being his two friends taking me up and he was like, I'm going to stay here. And the minute someone else volunteered to go with us, he was like, oh, well, you guys got it. I kind of felt like he knew he was scaring me.
And he enjoyed it all the anticipation and then nothing.
All was well. She's safe. But there's still that lingering feeling.
Or is it just in my head? Ever heard the expression, a wolf in sheep's clothing? It's a scary idea. It implies that someone's true. A malicious nature can be consumed by beauty, charm or just. How do you spot a wolf in disguise? By the end of camp, there's one meal you can't eat. And mine was the fetus just looking at it makes you want to gag. We were all sick and tired of camp food. I said Fresno's about an hour away.