Before I read the tweets, I'm going to read something heinous. Okay. My man told me he was hungry for some pizza last night, so I thought of a funny idea and texted my side from work that I was hungry for pizza. I told him to get it and bring it to me like he was DoorDash, and I told him my man was here too. He's hood, so he wasn't scared to come over. So he shows up with the food and I take it. And then I act like he gave me a receipt. Then I gave him a passionate tongue kiss. I then yell to my man to come tip him good. He then gives him a 50, and he daps him up for being quick. We ate lunch today on him. Can you even just deep what I just read?

For what? No, I can't. What is there to say? What is there actually to say?

Why is the only question? Why? What is the point of all of Thrills, bro.

Literally, some people just love the thrill and they love being evil.

Because that is brutal. That's brutal. To bring him to the yard, there's no fear from both sides of the She also, yeah, she doesn't...

This is what I'm saying, bro. Some people don't fear a consequence. They don't register a consequence. It's like, if I lift this prayer in my man's house right now, even if he catch me, what's he going to do?

Because I know my side is heard.

He has no He's going to do something back to me. Nothing's bad is going to happen. I do what I want. We ate lunch today on him. Also, your side is not a man because what's all this?

I like it. He's eating lunch with you. There's no way I'm the side and you're messaging me all this for kicks.

I'm hungry for pizza. I want you to come and bring pizza to me and my man's house.

And just act like DoorDash. And also I can get $50 an ellips. I'll just link you tomorrow. I will just link you tomorrow.

Simply shout me tomorrow.

Because I'm not doing all of this dance just to get you a thrill for your man.

No. Yeah, it's not. Because what's happening... Because also, yeah, cool. I've to go view your pizza. You list me, gang. I'm Then getting in my car and what? You're going to run upstairs to watch Shogun in bed eating pizza. They're going to bang. And then he's going to fuck the shit out of you. They're going to bang. And then what?

What am I doing tonight? You're running back to me tomorrow? No, man.

Then we get lunch tomorrow. I don't think so. Because I'm sleeping alone tonight. I don't want to hear all of that. Because I'm sleeping I'm alone tonight.

Yeah, I don't want to hear all that. Whatever you do with your man is what you do with your man.

What you do with me is a different story. Don't cross.

There's no crossover here. There's no crossovers here. I don't want to see him. He doesn't want to see me, and I don't want to see you with him.

He dapped me up. No, no, no, stop.

Anyway.

Anyway, that's bad. Oh, yeah. Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.

Girls suck at cuddling. Three minutes in, they be like, I got a question and don't lie. I'll roll my eyes.

Roll? Cuddling is for shut up-time.

I would roll my eyes.

I got a question and don't lie.

It's like, why do you want to disturb the piece?

Don't ruin the moment. Don't ruin the moment because cuddling is sensational. I've got a question and don't lie. And then she's going to sit up and she's going to be looking at you like that. Because we We've discussed this before.

I could bang a ting and not hold her afterwards. But if I'm cuddling you-You're the love of my life.

Big man, it's more than what you think it is.

Don't ask me stupid questions after that.

Since our skin has been touching, my BPM has dropped.Dropped because you keep me calm.I'm.

In bliss. And you keep me safe.

Yeah, fact. So don't be up in the room asking questions and saying not to lie because the first thing I'm going to do is lie.It's lie.Yeah..

Because I'm trying to keep this serenity.

Serenity. Fuck. Serenity. Bro, all I'm doing is lying about whatever you want to ask me, bro.

Just keep the peace, man.

Yeah, just let me cuddle, man.

Anyway. Shit. If your parents didn't use the word galvanting, did you really run the streets? And that's on God. That's on God. Africans love the word galvanting. Galvanting. Yeah. If you're just doing up whatever you're galivanting, that's hilarious. If I tap your name on me and we break up, I'm putting long live on top of it.

Okay. All right.

This is a text conversation. Do Do you want to play 21 questions? Yeah, you go first. Okay, few. Here goes nothing. Your pussy, describe it.

Describe it. Describe. That's disgusting.

Tweet, quote, tweet. What are your sex flaws? Quote, tweet. I'm satisfied with just eating ass. Yeah, it's one of those ones because you know the sex is bomb.

Bro, I'm satisfied with just that. I remember I used to chat to her 10 years ago, right? And she said she's such a giver. All she wants to do is give top. She doesn't want to do anything else. The whole preference The purpose of this thing is that she just wants to give top.

I don't think I've met a human like this. I've not met a human that doesn't want penetration on the side. I've never met one. Because that sounds sensational, James.

Of course it does.

I only want to give you top.

I remember I had my phone and when I read it, I was on my bed. I grabbed the corner and did a cocoon. That's how excited I was. Then once I was cocooned up, I was like that. Yeah, bro. You couldn't contain it. I couldn't contain the excitement. What do you mean, bro?

What do you actually mean?

Oh, wow. What time?

What's the time, indeed? I don't know the times. I've never had the time. I've never met a human like that. I'm living vicariously right now because that's brazen.

Penetration on the side is the funniest thing I've ever heard. Oh, my God.

Right. Oh, shit. I was arguing with my Asian coworker when my white coworker walked up and said, What is this? Rush hour 4? I called HR immediately. A hundred %.

Rush hour 4? Some people just think they can say and do what they want. Factual.

Flirting with shy men is so fun. I love watching them smile and making them feel like a damsel. Giggle for me, princess.

I'm pretty sure Joyce wrote that.

Was shy-er.

Was it? Yeah. Wow!

Was it really?

What are the odds?

It was shy-er. When I say that did numbers.

Oh, I bet. Giggle for me, princess.

That's something she would say.

That's 100% something she would say.

Giggle for me, princess.

Because if she said that to my face, the tide would turn faster than she would ever realize. Because I am shy. I am shy, so I'll be there like, Stop. She's like, Yeah, giggle for me, princess. I'm like, What?

The father you say? My smile will turn to an immediate frown.

Swear.

Yeah, and it's not a sexy thing.

It's It's not like a dominant like, yeah, it's not. I just start saying stuff.

It's not that dumb stuff that you want. All right, next one. There's no sex. I lied. You're going to lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Cool.

Last one. I saw a man squashing six babes in the back of a GLE outside a club last night. I need to get my money up. Facts. Relax.

Listen, I was talking to one of our boys recently, and he was reminding me of the days when we were in uni, and you just knew it was charged when you would leave the club and the Donnys in the blacked out Mercedes were just doing laps.Dropped.

Up as well in a winter.Dropped.

Up in a winter or an X5. X5 is the one. Blacked out X5 just doing laps. And All that man had to do was roll down the window and be like, Yo, you want to lift? Afterparty at mine. Yeah. And all your ears, everyone in the back.

Afterparty at mine.

Yeah. And then we're all scurrying in there. And then us and the broke boys just had to walk home.

We just had to pick up the litter. Yeah.

We went straight to the kebab shop. That's all we had. I can see the appeal, not the appeal, but there are So these men, at them times, the man that had the money up were 28, 29, and they were moving to 22-year-olds. If that. Fair. I say 22 because otherwise it just gets buzz. But let's just say For the sake of politics, let's just say-22. They were 22. You got these 28, 29 in their X5, scooping up the 22-year-olds, and they're just living the dream. And then you've got mand them that turn 28, 29, and they've just got their money up and they've got 28, 29-year-old woman telling them, Mortgage this.

X5 that.

Yeah, Mortgage this, X5 that, nursery this. He's thinking, No, because it's my turn to run laps. Yeah, to scoop things. It's my turn to go around Dean's Gate in an X5 and see who's hopping in. Why are we settling down?

No. The answer was no. I want my time to shine. I'm not settling because I want to play, too. I've seen my elders do it, and I'm trying to live that experience.

What's on this mortgage chart? Why did they get to do it? And I never did.

It's always me. It's always me. It's like when you said, I had my hoe face, and my hoe face is over now.

It's like, just allow it. You can still have this face one more time. Our face doesn't have to a year. Let's just be in the ho face just for the next fortnight. Please. Please. Please.

Let's just have fun.

Yeah, bro. Yeah. Oh, God. But yeah, I'm glad I didn't. Also, I remember getting to that age. I remember we were in Manchester one night and I saw a Uni night out. We were driving past and I saw a queue for a Uni night and you would have thought this was like an under-14s thing. I don't even remember. Bro, when you're 27, 28 and you look at an 18-year-old.

You can see that they're young. It's scary. It's also scary to think that as men at 18, we somewhat looked in that same bracket.

We looked like children. Do you see what I'm saying? I thought I was right. It's madness. I thought I genuinely believe there's no way until the Grays come, I'm not going to look any older.

It's probably the same way that 18-year-old girls view themselves now. They think they're fucking old until you see a 28-year-old male move to a freshly uni student. It's like, you can see the difference.

It's disgusting. It's disgusting. Anyway, that's the episode. That is the episode. Anyway, thank you, guys. That was good stuff. If you want some more, head on over to the LogCabern on Saturdays. If not, we will see you on Monday as usual. Love of love.

Gang, gang, gang.